You’ll have to forgive me, but today I need to have a little rant about what NOT to say to someone who is trying to recover from-or still enduring- cancer treatment. Especially in regards to hair!
To those people who feel the need to shriek in my direction when they run into me at the supermarket, at a local cafè or walking down the street, “OH MY GOD! Look at your hair! It’s coming back all grey!”, or, “OH MY GOD! Look at your hair! It must feel so good not to have to worry about it anymore!” Please stop and consider this.
Losing your hair to cancer treatment is extremely confronting and incredibly distressing. It is not a choice, or a fashion statement, or a new look to “embrace”. It has nothing to do with vanity and everything to do with feeling constant fear and no longer recognising yourself while you’re being poisoned, chopped up and radiated for an extensive period of time.
For all the years it took to grow my shoulder-length hair, it will take even longer for it to come back. It is a matter of patience, perseverance and acceptance. So instead of commenting about my post-chemo hair status, how about opening the conversation with, “It’s nice to see you looking well again.”, or, “It’s nice to see you out and about again.”.
And to all those lovely people who think before they speak, I thank you. Your kindness and thoughtfulness never goes unnoticed and encourages me to keep looking in the mirror and still see myself in there somewhere.